I was so lost, but now I believe.

Yeah
Hey, blog
What's up?
It's been quite a while.

To start with, exams.
Sucked so much this year.
So.
Much.
Gah.
The exams themselves, not the general time in school.
Buuuuuut,
I aced most of them (A- in English)
and I got As in most of my classes (A- in Honors Science [an impossible class], P in FLS [would have been an A, but i took the class Pass/Fail, so whatever])
And comparing this year to last year
I know so many more people in my grade.
And, it's not so much the knowing part, but I'm actually starting to like a lot more people.
Which is a good thing, I guess.
I'd gladly give examples, but there's something else on my mind.

Any guesses what it may be?
Well, I'm not in a great mood right now.
I was thinking again about how my friends treat me.
And a decent amount of the time, I end up with the answer "like crap"
A good example of this was yesterday.
I was supposed to go to Walgreens with Tori, because I said I wanted to buy more nail polish (that happens sometimes, =D)
So know what happens?
She invites Jason.
Of course.
Of course.
I guess I was just being stupid thinking that it could just be us two for something like that.
Guess I was wrong.
I hate so much being the third wheel, and that ALWAYS happens to whoever is with them.
I'm starting to get really sick of it.
Oh well. Aaaaaaaaaanyway.
Somewhere on the way there, we were all talking.
And I swear, one of them said to me,
"You are buying us something, right?"
I swear, my mind kind of went "WHAT?!?"
How many times have I had to buy anything for those two?
Especially Tori.
She owes me well over $200 by now.
And she should know that.
But, keeping that in mind,
Think of how many times THEY'VE bought me anything.
Almost never, if at all.
And I already know what their excuse would be.
"Stop being so selfish/materialistic!"
But, seriously.
I like doing things for myself, too.
Not just other people.
Know how much money I spent last Friday?
Somewhere around $50.
And want to guess how much I spent on myself?
Let me do the math.
$50-$10 (for Warren's hair dye)=$40. $40-$5 (for the toothbrushes)=$35. $35-($31-$8) (for the pizza, minus the money Tyne gave me for her and Tori)=$9.
$9 for a whole fucking day, that's all I spent on myself
the other $41?
For everyone else.
That's for everyone who calls me selfish.
And if you do, fuck you.
Because I'm really getting sick of this.
No more.
I'm not spending money on people who don't appreciate me.
Not anymore.
(I'm not even bringing up the whole birthday thing again)
Actually, I seriously want anyone who owes me money to finally pay me back.
Because I'm so damn sick of never having anything left for myself.
(I'm down to $18 now.)
And if you need to know how much you owe me, seriously talk to me.
Because I rarely forget.
And this whole thing is really starting to piss me off.

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"If I had a choice between you and me, I'd gladly choose you."

*insert some sort of smiley face here*
*insert witty comment here*
*some more smiley faces*
*maybe a few song lyrics*
*repeat until satisfied or signature is insanely long and people start complaining*

A poem of sorrow
While writing it, would you dance with me?